I know the importance of being still, but I’m no good at it. I try to be, but it’s a struggle. I’m followed by various tracks of questions put on repeat: “What do I do next? What should I be doing? Am I doing the right thing? How do I know if I’m doing the right thing? If I’m not doing the right thing, what should I be doing? What should I be pursuing? What about that person? Did I offend that person? Why is he or she being quiet? What should I do?” The questions aren’t easy ones to answer – they often are impossible to answer – yet the perfectionistic, impatient person I am wants answers right now. The more I think about how I don’t have the answers, the more frustrated and worried I become. I turn into the polar opposite of stillness. I’m on edge, jittery, cranky.
poetry
Why Do You Obsess about the Writing Rules?
“Why do you obsess about the writing rules?” The question wasn’t phrased exactly like that, but it was asked of me. I was asked why I’m concerned with the writing rules.
I had to pause before answering. The rules are so innate (even though I don’t and won’t ever know them all) that I can’t recall when I became fascinated with them. I know they weren’t always a part of it; like anyone else, I had to learn the building blocks of sentences. I learned new spelling and vocabulary words, diagrammed sentences, memorized prepositions. Even then I enjoyed the way words sounded and the way they could be put together to form sentences, paragraphs, and stories. Did the rules become a part of my writing life during those years?
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Form and Content
Form is one of my cherished topics for a couple of reasons. One, I have a visual arts background. Two, I have a poetry background. Three, I have a marketing background. All those things involve “form” in some shape or manner.
Hurting the Dear Ones
When I started to take my writing and my role as a writer seriously, I neglected one teeny-tiny detail: I inevitably was going to hurt those closest to me. I didn’t realize this truth until I allowed some family members to read a couple of my early poems, and they responded with both hurt feelings and concern. It was at that point I had to make a decision. Would I continue writing and risk hurting my dear ones or would I cease and desist from my writing?