The Writing Life
The Ents are going to wake up and find that they are strong. – Gandalf
When you’re weary and merely going through the motions of the work you are called to do, you don’t feel strong. You feel weak. You think everybody must know how weak you feel and are.
When your heart isn’t in it, you still work hard. You turn in your work on time. You continue to beat deadlines. You give your best efforts even if they feel false and pale in comparison to your usual ones. You trust that your heart will return to you, that you will find yourself giving your all, including all your heart, as you do your work.
Perfectionism can be a brutal thing. Discouragement can be equally so. When combined together, they don’t cancel each other out; they embolden and strengthen each other. The discouragement that could be overcome at any other time is magnified by the perfectionism and vice versa. Discouragement and perfectionism are a volatile and vicious cocktail.
Several weeks ago, I sent an e-letter that talked about not giving up. Ralph Dopping happened to read it, and he replied to it with a question: “How do you battle self-doubt?” I thought and thought about the question, then I sent a reply to Ralph. I also asked him if a follow-up blog post might be warranted. He didn’t seem to mind either way, so, here I am, writing a blog post about how to battle self-doubt.
When the words don’t come easily, when I have to fight for every one of them, I take solace in Richard Hugo’s thoughts. He says the hard work put into one piece of writing makes for the sudden ease of a future – not subsequent but future – piece of writing. I keep writing in hopes of finding that “sudden ease,” however brief it may be. A brief moment of ease is like the first drink of water after running a race. Nothing tastes quite as good as that water. Nothing is quite as refreshing.
A few weeks ago, I asked how people combat discouragement and stay the course. One commenter made a statement about having faith despite the naysayers and obstacles. It was a simple statement, but simple statements often have profound implications.