Most of my writer friends know I’m a fan of the Oxford comma. (I also appreciate “comma” jokes, such as the “comma, comma, comma” pictured with a chameleon. What? It’s funny. No, seriously.) I would hazard most people, though, find the Oxford conversation a little silly.
If you want to be a better writer, you must learn to let go of the words. Think of the process as being like teaching a kid to ride a bike. You would hold onto the back of the seat for a time, but eventually, you would release it. The kid must wobble and find the way to balance on his or her own power.